TransFamily Of Cleveland
New Site Coming Soon
TransFamily is a support group for transgendered and transsexual people, their parents, partners, children, other family members, friends, and supportive others. We provide referrals, literature, and over-the-phone information on all transgender issues. Although our meetings are held in Cleveland, Ohio, the Internet has enabled us to extend helping hands to transgendered individuals and their famlies across the globe.This site is not intended, in any way, to be a comprehensive listing of information, links and resources for transgendered and transsexual people. There is just way too much out there. The intent of this site is to offer some basic information, a point of contact for families beginning to deal with a loved one's gender idenity, email discussions for group members, and a starting point for related links. We're under construction, and hopefully, we always will be. We don't want this place to become static! The information here is constantly changing, so check back often!!
ABOUT US
TransFamily of Cleveland was founded to provide support and education for transgendered persons, their families, friends and significant others. We are associated with PFLAG to promote awareness of transgender persons and their issues. We are also associated with SSAFE, to bring awareness to our school systems, through their principals and counselors, by offering literature, speakers, consultation and support.
TransFamily Of Cleveland was formed by Karen and Bob Gross as a result of their efforts to find a support system to help them deal with their own child's transition.
Bob & Karen met in high school, and have now been married for 35 years. Bob has a Master's Degree in Business and works as a CPA. Karen has a Bachelors in Education and taught school for several years. She now splits her time between being Bob's office manager, running her own business (helping new mothers in the first weeks after childbirth), and TransFamily. Together, they have traveled throughout the country speaking to groups and PFLAG chapters campaigning for transgender issues. Bob and Karen also contributed a chapter to Mary Boenke's book Trans Forming Families: Real Stories About Transgendered Loved Ones
A MESSAGE FROM KAREN GROSS
"My name is Karen Gross, and I started TransFamily of Cleveland. I am the mother of a 30 yr old FTM "child" who came out to us about 5 yrs ago. I would have loved to have someone like the folks on this site to talk with. I guess that's why I started TransFamily - so that others can have what I missed." "
I knew from the beginning I would support my child and never kicked him "out of the family nest." But, I didn't understand why this had to happen. I still don't, and probably never will. However, my child is so much happier and leading a better life because of his transition, so I will accept my child and whatever it is he has to do to be a happier person."
TransFamily Discussion Lists
A Note From Karen: "Hi, thanks for considering joining one of our TransFamily support groups. The only requirement we have on these moderated lists is for you to send a brief introduction letting us know your situation and why you'd like to join the list.. When your subscription is approved and you are introduced, the others on the list will welcome and introduce themselves to you. Hope to receive your intro very soon so that we may get you up on these lists."
Thanks,
Karen Gross.
TRANSFAMILY NEWSLETTER - This is the only email way of getting the newsletter, unless someone else forwards a copy to you. The list is for distribution only, which means that nobody on the list can send an email to the other subscribers on the list.
No one will see your email address except the list managers. All subscriptions to the list must be approved.
>TransFamily Newsletter
TRANSFAMILY DISCUSSION LIST - This list is for all transitioning individuals, their friends, and family; any one who would like to participate in an exchange of information on the subject.What subjects? News, advice, support, suggestions, listings for special events and house parties, requests for information, shopping opportunities, and non group get-togethers.All subscriptions must be approved to ensure that the list's confidentiality will be maintained. After requesting a subscription, please prepare a brief introduction paragraph about you and your "trans" situation. You'll need to submit this paragraph to list moderator prior to the subscription being approved. Messages are sent to the list mail box, rather than the individual, and everyone receives a copy of the message. Anyone on the list can respond to a message. If you desire to personally respond to a message, privately and off of the list, please remember to change the email address from the list to the individual's. If you're concerned about getting too many e-mail's from the list, you can subscribe to a "digest" version of this list.
Click to subscribe to TransFamilyofCleve
TRANSFAMILY PARENTS DISCUSSION LIST - This list is intended as support group for the parents of transitioning individuals, regardless of the age of that child. The list moderators do permit some non-parents on a case by case basis.
All subscriptions must be approved to ensure that the list's confidentiality will be maintained. After requesting a subscription, please prepare a brief introduction paragraph about you and your "trans" situation. You'll need to submit this paragraph to list moderator prior to the subscription being approved. Messages are sent to the list mail box, rather than the individual, and everyone receives a copy of the message. Anyone on the list can respond to a message. If you desire to personally respond to a message, privately and off of the list, please remember to change the email address from the list to the individual's. If you're concerned about getting too many e-mail's from the list, you can subscribe to a "digest" version of this list.
Click to subscribe to TransFamily Parents
TRANSFAMILY COUPLES DISCUSSION LIST - This list is intended as support group for transitioning individuals and their spouses/life partners. The intent of the list is to help couples work their way through transition, whether or not they decide to remain together as a couple. It is not necessary for both members of a couple to be subscribed to the list. This list is not a dating service.
All subscriptions must be approved to ensure that the list's confidentiality will be maintained. After requesting a subscription, please prepare a brief introduction paragraph about you and your "trans" situation. You'll need to submit this paragraph to list moderator prior to the subscription being approved.
Messages are sent to the list mail box, rather than the individual, and everyone receives a copy of the message. Anyone on the list can respond to a message. If you desire to personally respond to a message, privately and off of the list, please remember to change the email address from the list to the individual's. If you're concerned about getting too many e-mail's from the list, you can subscribe to a "digest" version of this list.
TRANSFAMILY SPOUSES DISCUSSION LIST - This list is intended as support group exclusively for the spouses/life partners of transitioning individuals. The topics discussed on this list are different from those of the Couples list (above), attending to the very unique issues confronted by the spouse or partner of a transitioning individual.All subscriptions must be approved to ensure that the list's confidentiality will be maintained. After requesting a subscription, please prepare a brief introduction paragraph about you and your "trans" situation. You'll need to submit this paragraph to list moderator prior to the subscription being approved. Messages are sent to the list mail box, rather than the individual, and everyone receives a copy of the message. Anyone on the list can respond to a message. If you desire to personally respond to a message, privately and off of the list, please remember to change the email address from the list to the individual's. If you're concerned about getting too many e-mail's from the list, you can subscribe to a "digest" version of this list.
TRANSFAMILY YOUTH DISCUSSION LIST - This list is intended as support group for transitioning teenagers, including young adults to age 21, although the moderator may permit some younger and older individuals on a case by case basis. This list is not a dating service All subscriptions must be approved to ensure that the list's confidentiality will be maintained. After requesting a subscription, please prepare a brief introduction paragraph about you and your "trans" situation. You'll need to submit this paragraph to list moderator prior to the subscription being approved. Messages are sent to the list mail box, rather than the individual, and everyone receives a copy of the message. Anyone on the list can respond to a message. If you desire to personally respond to a message, privately and off of the list, please remember to change the email address from the list to the individual's. If you're concerned about getting too many e-mail's from the list, you can subscribe to a "digest" version of this list.
TRANSFAMILY CHILDRENS DISCUSSION LIST - This list is intended as support group for the children of transitioning parents (including adult children). All subscriptions must be approved to ensure that the list's confidentiality will be maintained. After requesting a subscription, please prepare a brief introduction paragraph about you and your "trans" situation. You'll need to submit this paragraph to list moderator prior to the subscription being approved. Messages are sent to the list mail box, rather than the individual, and everyone receives a copy of the message. Anyone on the list can respond to a message. If you desire to personally respond to a message, privately and off of the list, please remember to change the email address from the list to the individual's. If you're concerned about getting too many e-mail's from the list, you can subscribe to a "digest" version of this list.
Letter One
Letter Two
Letter Four
Our Trans Children is a booklet that Mary Boenke wrote for PFLAG. Acrobat Plug-In Required. The pages of this booklet will give you a very good over view of what "transgendered" means, what the transgendered individual feels, is up against, and needs to do to resolve the issues. Keep in mind that this booklet primarily deals with transsexuals. Most of your initial questions will be answered in Mary's text. This booklet serves as an excellent introduction to the subject, and is a companion piece to Mary's book Trans Forming Families: Real Stories About Transgendered Loved Ones
Revised Benjamin Standards Of Care are intended to provide flexible directions for the treatment of persons with gender identity disorders. This is the "Bible" that recommends how transgendered people must be cared for by the medical community. This is the sixth and most current revision. For the spouse/partner, this is very important to know information.
Sexual Orientation Confusion Among Spouses of Transvestites and Transsexual Following
Disclosure of Spouse's Gender Dysphoria
Stages Of Grief
The Transsexual Person in Your Life
The Other Side of the Closet : The Coming-Out Crisis for Straight Spouses and Families
Tri-Ess
S.P.I.C.E.
The Couples Page
Reba's Journal
Trans-Positioned
Even Genetic Girls Get the Blues
Myths &Misconceptions About Crossdressers
FROM TRANSFAMILY
Our Trans Children is a booklet that Mary Boenke wrote for PFLAG.Acrobat Plug-In Required. The pages of this booklet will give you a very good over view of what "transgendered" means, what we feel, what we're up against, and what we do to resolve the issues. Most of your initial questions will be answered in Mary's text. This booklet serves as an excellent introduction to the subject, and is a companion piece to Mary's book Trans Forming Families: Real Stories About Transgendered Loved Ones.
Transgender Glossary of Terms courtesy of GLAAD (Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation.), this glossary contains proper terms, their definitions, and terms to avoid.
Revised Benjamin Standards Of Care are intended to provide flexible directions for the treatment of persons with gender identity disorders. This is the "Bible" that recommends how transgendered people must be cared for by the medical community. This is the sixth and most current revision
STORIES FROM TRANSFAMILY MEMBERS
Nicole's Escape is the heartbreaking story of a transgendered high school student, teased unmercifully, until suicide was the only answer. This true story was written by Timothy J. Gibbons and published in the November 22, 1998 edition of the News-Herald.
Gender 101 is a FAQ (frequently asked questions) styled explanation of transgender issues. It was written by Tracy Mather to facilitate her transition at work. Humorous and very informative, it should be read by all.
Why Don't You Tell Them I'm A Boy comes from Florence, the mother of a female to male transsexual. Florence writes, "Setting my daughter free meant more than I'd imagined."
Sherry's Story was compiled from emails Sherry wrote while in San Francisco for her F2M child's top surgery. This "journal" shows the perspective of an "accepting and loving" parent coming to grips with the reality of her child changing gender.
Transition In The Workplace was written by Joanne Pippin. This article looks at the issues encountered by a transsexual in the workplace, and details a very successful transition at work, and at home.
STORIES FROM OTHER SOURCES
Mom, I Need To Be A Girl The remarkable book by "Just Evelyn," available to read on the web courtesy of Lynn Conway.
Lynn's Story Lynn is one of the early pioneers. A prominent engineer with IBM in the late 60's, she was fired after it was discovered she was a pre-op transsexual.
Jennifer's Story Jennifer details and explains her transition.
A Parent's Dilemma, the Transgender Child is by Gianna Eveling Israel. She covers many good topics that deal with helping a parent reach an understanding over their child's gender issues.
The Transsexual Person in Your Life Written by members of the Mid-Michigan FTM Alliance, this is a very good FAQ sheet on the subject.
Talking with your Children about Gender Identity IssuesAnother excellent article by Gianna Eveling Israel. In this one, she addresses helping a child understand a parent's gender issues.
Transgender Language and Definitions From Sexuality.org, a helpful listing of basic terminology applicable to transgendered individuals.
Click to subscribe to TransFamily Couples
Click to subscribe to TransFamily Spouses
Click to subscribe to TransFamily Teens
Click to subscribe to TransFamily Children
LETTERS TO LOVED ONES
In this section, you'll find a resource of letters, written by real people, to either come out or explain the coming out of a transgendered loved one.
How Grandma told her 5 1/2 year old granddaughter
From A Mother, To Family And Friends
A Brother Learns To Accept His New Brother
SPOUSES & PARTNERS
So, what do you do if your husband, wife, or partner suddenly drops the bomb shell on you that they believe they're the wrong sex? Unfortunately, there is precious little GOOD information out there for spouses/partners who are looking for answers. Many sites are out of date or the links are broken. Other sites are written by a transgendered individual and targeted towards the spouse/partner.... not necessarily what someone in that position is looking for. Here's what we can offer:
The abstract of a research study conducted by Sallie Hunt, M.A., MFCC Private Practice Adjunct Faculty California State University, Fresno Fresno City College and Terri L. Main, M.A., MFCC Intern Kings River Community College. (A bit dry, but very interesting).
Anita Lees, wife of a transsexual, outlines the stages of grief that a SOFFA (Significant Other, Friend, Family, or Ally) usually goes through.
Directed mainly for spouses, this page has answers to some frequently asked questions/frequently held concerns.
This book was written for the straight spouse of a gay/lesbian, although some of the issues are common. Dr. Buxton analyzes six key issues a straight spouse faces when a partner `comes out' including damaged sexuality, threatened marital relationships, conflicting spouse/parent roles, devalued self-concept, destroyed integrity and shattered belief systems. Dr. Buxton has spoken at TransFamily. Straight Spouse Network, Reaching out, healing, building bridges. SSN is an international support network of heterosexual spouses and partners, current or former, of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender mates. Members provide confidential personal support and resource information to spouses and partners nationwide and abroad.
Tri-Ess is an educational, social and support group for heterosexual crossdressers, their spouses or partners and their families. They support both crossdressers and their spouses.
The SPICE conferneces are sponsored by Tri-Ess. Spice focuses on the attributes, affects, consequences and coping skills needed when women or men are confronted with and attempting to adjust to the phenomenon of crossdressing in their significant other.
Vanessa & Linda Kaye's site devoted to making a relationship work.
From 1998, a couple of weeks in the life of a the wive of a transgendered individual.
Excellent article by a lesbian partner of an F2M.
An FAQ styled page for wives/partners of cross-dressers, outling the issues and detailing some coping mechanisms.
Another good FAQ styled page aimed mainly at wives who have just discovered their husband is a transvestite.
WHAT IS TRANS?
Transsexual? Transgender? M2F? F2M? Intersexed? You mean a CD isn't referring to a compact disc and TV isn't talking about television? If you've never had anything to do with someone who questions their gender, then those names and acronyms probably sound strange, confusing, and maybe even frightening. The purpose of this page, and it's links, is to help clear the haze for anyone who has questions about what being transgendered is about and like.
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